How to be assertive

It's easy to find ourselves stuck in situations where we feel unable to say things upfront. We don't like feeling regret for our inaction. Here are some tips for you to be more assertive:

Being aware of your needs, priorities, and goals from various perspectives provides a sense of internal security, enabling you to make decisions in the moment. This could involve setting boundaries in relationships, such as deciding who to spend time with, when to engage in activities, or what actions to take. Essentially, it’s about answering all your WH questions (Who, What, When, Where, Why, How) and exploring your current self with openness and curiosity.

It also involves thinking ahead to the future, imagining the best to worst outcomes of your decisions, and accepting these outcomes with calmness, even amidst uncertainty and mistakes. Trust that your future self will be happy and proud of the decisions you make now.

Additionally, it’s about connecting with your past self, acknowledging your achievements, and recognising how far you’ve come. Celebrate your progress and let go of past fears, showing kindness and forgiveness for previous decisions that caused regret. Accept that you are a product of your past, imperfect but continually improving as you move forward in life.

This might sound like a story from “A Christmas Carol,” but I found it truly liberating to not only feel like someone else is observing me but also to be a companion to myself.